Tying The Knot On Ganesha's Trunk

Maa says that if you really wish for something (within reasonable limits of course!), tie an imaginary knot on Ganesha's trunk and don't open it till the wish is fulfilled. Every time my parents board the return flight to India, I tie this imaginary knot on Ganesha's trunk so that I get to see them soon.

What do you choose at a certain point in life: your parents and relatives, or your life in this country, now the birthplace of your kids? The kids know no other world, loving America and all things American with a natural passion. Obsessed with our lives, have I become too accustomed to the lifestyle here, how easily all jobs get done, the cleanliness, the dust and pollution free weather, the American dollar? Lifestyle and jobs are great in India too, but I dread settling in a "new" land and starting all over again.... what if I find India too chaotic....and besides, the U.S. has been my home for the last fourteen years. I was excited with Abhinava Bindra’s gold at the Olympics, but not so much, as when I was screaming myself hoarse with my kids, for Michael Phelps to win gold in the 100 meters butterfly.

My parents have never asked me to return to India, nor has my husband’s mom. But what happens when they decide that this twenty hours plus journey from India to the US is too much for them. Does my conscience, and love for them, accept the summertime visits as enough? Other American Indians must have had similar thoughts, they have made short trips to India to be with their family in times of happiness and in times of loss, and then returned to the US and resumed their lives. Are they at peace?

A courageous few I know have returned to India. With the festive season approaching, it’s easier to push back these thoughts and just focus on the present …… kids, their activities, daily life, job, parties, friends, books, music, Durga Puja, Thanksgiving, Christmas........it is easier to believe that there is no option except the present.