Saturday, July 26, 2008

The Topsy Turvy Calendar


The sunshine has turned to a soft gold, signaling the advent of Durga puja (Durga: a Hindu Goddess, Puja: worship). It's August now, and in two months we will be celebrating one of our most important festivals. If a Bengali were to be marooned on an island having lost count of days, the specs of white cloud in an otherwise clear blue sky would be an ideal way to predict the arrival of Durga Puja! For it is in our blood.

Here we do not have the joy of watching pandals (somewhat similar to huge tents, but grander) being constructed or Dhakis (drum beaters) making the rounds of houses, beating their drums in unison.

This afternoon in a sudden rush of nostalgia I called my university friend in California. Between chit chats, she casually mentioned that she was going out to celebrate Durga Puja in the evening! I was not sure if I had heard her right, Durga Puja in August? It’s like celebrating Christmas in June!

(Info for those interested, the rest of you may pass!
 Durga puja is celebrated mostly in the months of September and October. In a version of the Ramayana, the ancient Hindu epic, Rama invokes the goddess Durga before his battle with Ravana. Although she was traditionally worshipped in the spring, the contingencies of battle forced Rama to invoke her in autumn. The celebration in autumn has gained ascendancy now, though the worship of Durga in spring, known as Basanti Puja, is also present in the Hindu almanac. The worship is held over a five-day period, which is traditionally viewed as the arrival of Durga and her children at her father Himalaya's home. Bengalis celebrate this occasion with prayers, new clothes and gifts.)

In the US however, the “contingencies” of booking halls, convenient holidays, groupism  among the Bengalis have given way to a boom in the celebration of Durga Puja. Except for temples that celebrate and worship on the exact calendar days, it is as if the Goddess Durga has graciously agreed to accommodate the different Bengali groups throughout the months of September, October and November, almost every weekend! But the California Bengalis have managed to set unprecedented example in celebrating the Puja in August.

I guess its okay; the Goddess can be worshipped at any time and any place, especially as we refer to her as the Mother. You can visit your mom anytime! So long as the ambiance is of mellow golden sunshine, the exact warmth and color of which brings a rush of nostalgia to the Bengalis.

Saturday, July 12, 2008

The BFF, Mic, Mac, Faces & Gazettes


Have categorized our friend circle into four groups:

BFF (best friends)
The Mic (small tight knit group)
The Mac (friends in general)
Faces (& acquaintances)
Gazettes

I cannot do without our Bengali friends or the Gazettes! They are in every group, opening door to a spicy universe, filtering our little joys and sorrows to the world.

Some of us have relatives in the US, but for most of us the friends represent an extended family. Say, during Durga Puja, I will be miserable if I do not catch up with The Mac, the Faces and the Gazettes (the Mic tends to interact almost every other week). It revitalizes the self to walk around the puja hall, saying hello to almost every other face, and the info from a gazette can sustain us throughout the year.

If someone within a group is unwell, the BFFS or Mic will cook and bring dishes for the family. The Mac will call, ready to help in anyway, and the faces will at least pass on the news of your welfare (and the gazette will spice it up…er… I wouldn’t exactly call it gossip). The news usually comes back in a circle to the individual concerned, some are upset, but I enjoy my two minutes of fame!

It’s nice to belong to a Mic. My kids wanted to see this batman movie, when someone from our Mic group took them for a late night movie and popcorn. During my very difficult pregnancy I did not have to worry about cooking or chauffeuring my kids back and forth from activities or even grocery. The BFFs and the Mic helped me out.

I love these friends and even if there is gossip it is okay!! These very friends (and we have our fights and arguments), bring me a drink at parties, notice changes in the kids -  how pretty or handsome they are becoming every year, they cuddle my baby and hold him for hours at a party, attend the anniversaries and birthdays, see to it that my kids are having proper dinner at parties, cook for my husband when I am away, care for me when I am sick…. the list is endless.

And somehow they make me feel at home here